How To Make Yourself More Approachable Part 2

First, always go out with friends, because “social proof” is the closest thing to a psychological pheromone. But be careful that you don't turn your circle of friends into an army of cockblockers.

Ask yourself: “Would I try to talk to a cute guy if he was surrounded by people I didn’t know? Then why am I expecting him to do it?”

So, take frequent bathroom breaks and go the long way around. Or tell your friends you saw somebody you want to talk to—and wander around the place. Make yourself available. That will make you more approachable and give you the opportunity to meet more gay men.

What If He Looked And Came Over!

Okay, so you’ve smiled, thrown the glances, created V-lines, worn the right clothes (see past posts in this series) in the right way, separated yourself from the herd and he not only glanced back, but he came over!

Now what?

You’re halfway home. His or yours, to be determined. Use the conversational techniques we talked about in past posts, put one foot in front of the other, and you’ll no doubt end up with his manhood, his phone number or the keys to his house.

UNLESS... your body language goes south. Make sure you keep sending the right signals by:

Creating invisible ‘hallways.’

Use your hands and arms to form a sort of hallway between the two of you. This is a great way to draw him in closer to you while at the same time sending a “back off he’s mine” signal to others. It’s a more intimate version of the V-shaped corridor you made earlier.

Point, point, point.

With your hands, your feet and your head. Your head? Yes. Nod when he speaks. It not only signals agreement, it’s a subconscious way of pointing, which as you know, is a man’s way of saying he wants to fill you out like an application.

If you’re leaning on a table, make sure the supporting hand and fingers are pointed toward him. If you’re sitting, cross your knees toward him. If you’re standing, lean toward him. Point, point, point.

Get him to touch you.

Wear a tie that needs to be straightened or put some lint on a dark shirt. He won’t be able to resist brushing the lint off or straightening your tie. It requires coming into your intimate zone, where sparks will fly.

Leave something behind.

If you need to go to the bathroom or meet a friend, leave something with him. Like a vial of lip balm, a key chain, or a lighter. Subconsciously you’re saying, “I don’t want to leave you.” If he takes it (as opposed to leaving it on the bar or table), it’s a good sign he wants to keep talking.

Lead him down the garden path.

Think of yourself as a landscaper—you’ve got to clear the path to your door. Every gesture, movement, posture and expression can be a weed or a flower, a downed tree limb blocking the path or a landscaped canopy welcoming him forward.

If you make the path clear and inviting, you’re going to get a lot of guys banging on your front door.

Or back door, depending on your preference.