How To Find A Gay Boyfriend? Conquer Your Fear of Rejection
How To Find Gay Guys Worthy of Being Your Partner
Google "how do gay guys find boyfriends" and you'll rarely see this as an answer: Turn your fear of rejection into fuel. Rejection is biggest obstacle that any guy faces when it comes to improving his love life. Most guys will do anything to avoid being rejected by a good looking guy, including never trying at all.
Sound familiar?
I know it does for me. I've been there; we all have. That's why I want to administer FIRST AID to every gay guy who's struggling with a crippling fear of rejection. Let's start with a question: Where did you get this fear? I mean, getting rejected by a guy doesn't physically harm you. I don't remember ever getting a black eye when a guy didn't respond the way I wanted.
So why all the emotional hassle?
Because it only takes a few embarrassments and humiliations to create what seems like a lifetime of scars. Those "episodes" created emotional injuries long before you ask that new guy out for the first time. Injuries that cause so much lasting damage that many men subconsciously (and even consciously) make a decision to never let it happen again.
Sound about right?
Come up with an example of a moment that caused you to stop "putting yourself out there" with guys. Trust me, it won't take you very long. I know it doesn't for me. I remember it like it was yesterday.
It took everything I had to approach this guy I was crushing on in college. I introduced myself and about a minute into the conversation he walked away from me. AS I WAS TALKING. No goodbye, no nice to meet you. He just walked away in the middle of a sentence as if he were standing next to a potted plant.
I was absolutely humiliated. But over time I learned 2 things about how to meet gay men:
1. EVERY man has similar "embarrassing" and "humiliating" experiences in his past.
2. Not ONE of us ever DIED from them. No one required emergency surgery. No one needed CPR on the spot.
Since you're human, I'm pretty sure you survived as well.
I want to assert something: Rejection is not only survivable but properly channeled it can be a good thing. Ever see that movie "APOCALYPSE NOW"? Marlon Brando plays a bad-ass colonel who describes what it takes to defeat an enemy. The quote that struck me was, "MAKE FRIENDS OUT OF FEAR."
What he meant was this: When confronted with something that makes you nervous, anxious or afraid, you have a choice. You can run and hide or you can harness the power of your fear and use it to your advantage. Fear can actually help you succeed, instead of forcing you to fail.
Unharnessed fear convinces you not to approach a guy because you don't know what to say. Harnessed fear propels you to find out the right things to say BEFORE you approach him.
Now what are those things? We'll be covering them in a series of posts in the next few weeks. But if you want to get a jump on it, we suggest you read the book, Meet Hotter Gay Guys. The 21 Day Plan To Overcome Your Fear of Rejection, Master the Art of Icebreakers and Snag Guys You Never Thought You Could Get.
Cuz, like, that's where we're cribbing all our notes! ;>)
